My Life Through Christ Jesus

Forgiveness

2008-03-04T13:33:00.003-06:00

My life right now is pretty confusing. I am finding out who my true friends are and am finding out who I thought were my friends. Over the past few years I have had friends who have walked out of my life. I have had friends who have said that they never want to talk to ever again. I have had friends that moved. I have had friends who I thought were in my circle of best friends but I am finding out that they are turning out to be only acquaintances.

My friends have such an impact on my life. They are always there for me -- at least my two best friends are. I am finding that the more I depend upon friends and just people in general that I am more likely to get hurt. We are all humans and we will let others down and will hurt other not meaning to. At the beginning of this one situation I thought that I could just get through it with the love and encouragement of people. Boy let me tell you I was wrong about that! All I got out of doing that was getting hurt even worse and having the hurt and unforgiveness towards the other person be dragged out even further. It took about a month after what happened for me to totally forgive this person. I thought that if I kept telling myself that I'd forgiven the person that I might actually believe it. No. God knows me better than that, He knows me better than I know myself. He knows that I listen better when He talks through other people and that is what He did. I was sitting there in youth group one Sunday evening and the person that was leading it that night (see, we don't have a youth minister at the moment. So we have loving adults that volunteer week after week.) and he was talking about forgiveness and doing everything you can to live at peace with everyone as far as it depends upon you. And it felt like I was the only in the room, God knew that I needed this at that moment. It was in this moment that I knew in my heart that I had not totally forgiven this person and that I needed to forgive them for everything and I also needed to love on them. I left that night just about in tears -- I didn't feel like crying there where everyone would ask me what was wrong. When I got home and was by myself I just broke down. I prayed that God would help me to forgive this person and that I could show love towards them even though I knew that they would never show it back towards me. I asked God to forgive me for not going to Him first and to forgive me for not forgiving the other person. A few days after this I felt the Lord telling me to put my feelings into action. So I prayed about what God wanted me to do. I got on my computer and started writing an email to this person. I told them that I was sorry for the way I've acted towards them lately and I asked for forgiveness about that. Then I told them that I forgave them for all the stuff they had said/done and I said some other stuff that I felt the Lord telling me to say to this person. After I sent the email to the person I felt a peace that only God can give us. I cannot remember the last time I truly felt that peace.

To the person who I am referring to: Jesus tells us to love and pray for everyone. So through Christ' love I love you. I pray everyday that you are doing well and I also pray that God give you the peace that He has given me. I pray that in Christ you will love everyone and never hate anyone.. I pray that no matter what happens, that you will be able to forgive everyone for anything the say and/or do. I pray that no matter what happens that you will put all your trust in God. I pray that you will never turn your back on the only person that will NEVER turn His back to you: Jesus Christ. I guess that this is the end of a friendship that I was so sure would last. I guess that I have to say goodbye to a friend that I was so sure would always be there for me. I guess God only wanted us to be friends for a little while. I guess He thought that we could learn something from the other person. And just maybe later in life we might end up as friends again. We never know, do we? I hope and pray that you follow your heart and listen to God. If God is telling you to do something but the world is telling you to do something else, listen to God. You may not like how it feels right then and there but in the end you will be glad that you listened to Him. I promise.

"Pryer for a friend" by Casting Crpwns

2008-02-14T22:53:00.000-06:00

"Prayer For A Friend"

Lord, I lift my friend to You, I've done all that I know to do
I lift my friend to You
Complicated circumstances have clouded his view
Lord, I lift my friend up to You

I fear that I won't have the words that he needs to hear
I pray for Your wisdom, oh God, and a heart that's sincere
Lord, I lift my friend up to You

Lord, I lift my friend to You
My best friend in the world, I know he means much more to You
I want so much to help him, but this is something he has to do
And Lord, I lift my friend up to You

'cause there's a way that seems so right to him
But You know where that leads
He's becoming a puppet of the world, too blind to see the strings
Lord, I lift my friend up to You
My friend up to You

Lord, I lift my friend to You, I've done all that I know to do
I lift my friend to You

"Love them like Jesus" by Casting Crowns

2008-02-14T22:45:00.001-06:00

"Love Them Like Jesus"

The love of her life is drifting away
They're losing the fight for another day
The life that she's known is falling apart
A fatherless home, a child's broken heart

You're holding her hand, you're straining for words
You trying to make - sense of it all
She's desperate for hope, darkness clouding her view
She's looking to you

Just love her like Jesus, carry her to Him
His yoke is easy, His burden is light
You don't need the answers to all of life's questions
Just know that He loves her and stay by her side
Love her like Jesus
Love her like Jesus

The gifts lie in wait, in a room painted blue
Little blessing from Heaven would be there soon
Hope fades in the night, blue skies turn to gray
As the little one slips away

You're holding her hand, you're straining for words
You're trying to make sense of it all
They're desperate for hope, darkness clouding their view
They're looking to you

Just love them like Jesus, carry them to Him
His yoke is easy, His burden is light
You don't need the answers to all of life's questions
Just know that He loves them and stay by their side
Love them like Jesus

Lord of all creation holds our lives in His hands
The God of all the nations holds our lives in His hands
The Rock of our salvation holds our lives in His hands
He cares for them just as He cares for you

So love them like Jesus, love them like Jesus
You don't need the answers to all of life's questions
Just know that He loves them and stay by their side
Love them like Jesus
Love them like Jesus

A friend...

2008-02-04T18:14:00.000-06:00

A friend is someone who is always there for you... no matter what! True friends never give up on each other.. never. Friends should never turn their back to each other. They should stick closer than ever during hardships. Friends should encourage instead of insult. Friends will move and pain will come, but never should a true friend cause true hard pain. Though distance may separate two friends, they should never quit talking. It's sad when two friends quit talking just because they never get to see each other anymore. It's sad when friends quit talking. I always used to think that true friends never gave up on each other, no matter what. I used to think that friends were friends were friends were friends forever... I guess that I had that wrong all this time.

2008-01-29T23:20:00.000-06:00

Life is hard. There are so many hardships that we all must face. We all have our own ways of facing them. Some people choose to hurt themselves, some choose to put stuff into their bodies thinking that it could take away the pain... but I am choosing to lean on God. I could do anything that I want to. But why do stuff to my body that does nothing but does even more harm to me? God is almighty. He is holy. He is loving. He is everything that we need in life. With God we lack nothing. So instead of putting crap into my body, instead of harming my body, or doing something else to deal with everything, I am trusting God. I know that everything that happens happens for a reason and He has everything under control. Stuff happens in life that we may not like, but God is using that situation to build us, to grow us closer to Him, and to give us a little challenge every once in awhile. What would life be without any challenges? We've just got to trust God in everything that happens. And that is what I am doing right now...

I remember...

2007-11-28T21:01:00.000-06:00

I remember the first time we really talked. I was down front in church on July 9th 2006 for when I rededicated my life to the Lord. You had said something about wanting to talk to me more about it and some other stuff so you asked for my email address and that is when we really started talking. It’s funny cause not even a whole month later I was talking to you about stuff that I had done. Usually it takes me longer to get to know someone before I start telling them stuff. I remember in November going out to the mall and going to see a movie for my birthday. What was really kinda funny about that night, is that you and Jacquelyn actually talked more than I did. I vividly remember sitting there in the food court while you guys were talking... oh gosh I don’t remember how long we were sitting there, but it seemed like forever. I kept looking around the food court trying to seem like I was interested in different things and I gotta tell you, the little kiddy ride got kinda boring to look at. lol. I remember in December coming to church one Sunday evening, walking into the gym and being greeted by you before I was even half way between the door and the tables. When you gave me a hug you whispered into my ear “Jacquelyn called me...” Then you hugged me even tighter... I remember I standing there trying my best to fight back to tears... but it didn’t work to well. I remember calling you up New Years evening and you telling Jacquelyn and I “Please do NOT call after 9...” I remember feeling so bad about it! I cannot remember when you told me that you and Jeremy would be moving later in the year but I do remember sitting on my bed crying about it. Because I knew that things would never be the same again! When I was in a bad mood, was really upset about something or was just out of it, I remember the smile on your face always made me smile.. and it always will, no matter what! When everything was going wrong, I remember your hug always seemed to make everything seem better. I never felt like I had to pretend to be someone I’m not when I was with you. I remember laughing at something that was pretty dumb or stupid. But now it’s hard to even get a laugh... We barley talk, when we do talk its never for long. I think our average phone call is around 3-5 mins. And that’s like what ever 2-3 weeks? If that! All I have to say is.... I miss you! I miss your hug! I miss your smile! I miss talking to you! I miss laughing with you! I just miss you!

i'm confused.

2007-11-27T09:41:00.000-06:00

I feel lonely. I feel alone. I don't know who to talk to. My friends aren't really there for me like i thought they were... sometimes it seems like they don't even care about me... about what i'm going through. I thought our relationships were strong.... but I guess I was wrong. Now days I often find myself wondering if they even care. They say they care....do they mean it? My family says they care... so THEY even mean it? Does anyone ever mean anything they say to me anymore? I feel so alone right now. I feel like everyone has left me standing alone by myself in the middle of nowhere. So many of my mentors have moved away and now we barley talk anymore. I've had what I thought were good friends.. until they stabbed me in the back with lies about me they made up. But what really gets me is the friendships I have right now. I don't understand. I'm really confused about what to do...

2007-11-05T18:02:00.000-06:00

Sometimes all I want to do is get away. Right now I just want to get away... away from situations, away from family, away from fights, away from life... I hate what I am going through. I don't get it. I don't understand life. I don't understand all the crap we have to go through. I don't understand a broken heart. How do I fix it? Will it ever heal? How long will it be broken? Do you remember when we were little kids how a kiss would heal EVERYTHING, why can't it still be that way? Why can't a kiss heal a broken heart? I can't do this!!! I can't life life the way I want to... to its fullest. I don't know how to. Sometimes I just want to quit. I just wanna give up.

untitled

2007-10-29T18:23:00.000-05:00

I miss you. I miss you so. So much it hurts to remember. I want to remember. I want to remember all those good times we have had, but it just hurts to much. I just want to remember all those warm hugs we have shared over the years, but those memories only make me weep. I want to think about all the conversations we have had, but they only bring tears to my eyes. I want to think about all the laughs we have shared, but they only make me cry. I never want to forget you... I never want to lose you... I never want to let go of you, but everyone is telling me that I need to. Can this be one of those times when I don't listen to what they all say? You mean so much to me and I just can't let go that easy, I just cant and I never will forget you! I love you!

Where are you?

2007-10-26T23:28:00.000-05:00

Where are you when I need to talk? Where are you when I need a hug? Where are you when I need comfort? Where when I need a shoulder to cry on? Where are you when I just need someone to be with? Where are you when I need advice? Where are you when I need your love? where are you when I need to see your smile? Where are you when I just need to get away from everything and be with the people I love most? Where are you when I need to talk but no one understands me and what I am going through? Where are you when I just wanna hangout and be with you? Where are you when I just need you? Where are you when I need to see you the most? Whee are you when I am hutting? Where are you when I am crying? Where are you when I am lonely? Where are you when I am depressed? WHERE ARE YOU?!?!?!?

Sometimes

2007-10-26T23:15:00.000-05:00

Sometimes in life we just need people to be there for us. Not necessarily for anything in particular, but to just be there for us. Sometimes the times we need people the most is when we don't want to be around anyone and when we are in that "unlovable" mood. And there are those times when we need someone but they aren't there. Sometimes when we can't say anything is when we really need to say the most. Sometimes when there isn't anyone there, we wish that there was someone and sometimes when there is someone, we wish there was not anyone there. Sometimes we wish that cretin people would not believe you when you say "yeah, everything is fine". Sometimes we need a hug, but there is either no one to hug us or just are not the right person. Sometimes we just need to be around people that we love and care for. Sometimes we need people that truly love and care for us.

Dancing + Rain = Fun!

2007-10-22T16:50:00.000-05:00

The rain is falling and I am dancing in it. I am letting all my emotion loose. I am getting washed clean of all my pain and hurts. I am giving them all to God. I cannot bare them anymore. They have made me weak. I am tired of fighting not to cry day in and day out. Dancing in the rain like a crazy person does something to me and makes me feel better. I am happy. I cannot remember the last time I was really happy and not just pretending. People can pretend all they want, but there is no greater feeling than being loved by God and being truly happy! I cannot remember the last time I actually smiled and laughed this much and just had random fun like this. I have not felt like this in a long time. I want it to rain all the time and I want to continually be dancing in it. Dancing in the rain is fun. It is a great way to let stuff out without even having to say a single word.

I have a dare for you...Next time it rains, go dance like a crazy person and dance like NO ONE is watching. It is a lot of fun and hey, you might even have fun!

Do you....

2007-10-16T18:16:00.000-05:00

Listen to me! Listen to the pain in my voice. Look at me! Look at my eyes, do you see all the hurt behind them? Look at my face. Do you see the emotion on it? Do you see all the hurting and pain I am in? Or are you blind? Do you even care? Do you know w much I am hurting right now? Do you even know me anymore? Do you know how much I have changed? Would you recognize me if we somehow someway someday came across each other? Would you take time to say "hi"? Or would you just act like I am just one of the many strangers that you pass each day? Would you be able to tell that I am in pain and am hurting? Would you believe me if I said "I'm fine"? Would you still be able to tell in the tone of my voice that I am lying? Would you even recognize my voice anymore? Do you even remember who I am? Do you even remember that I am alive? Do you even care anymore? Do you even know who I am? Do you even remember ever meeting me?

Amazing Grace (My Chains Are Gone)

2007-09-21T18:12:00.000-05:00

What do the lyrics in this song mean to you? It reminds me of our great God's love for us, what HE has done for us... remember, He sent His ONLY son to die for OUR sins. Jesus did NOTHING wrong, HE died for so that WE could live, so that WE can be free. Right now it is the only song I can sing with my whole heart, other songs just seem like words written on paper.

"Amazing Grace (My Chains Are Gone)" by Chris Tomlin

Amazing grace
How sweet the sound
That saved a wretch like me
I once was lost, but now I'm found
Was blind, but now I see
'Twas grace that taught my heart to fear
And grace my fears relieved
How precious did that grace appear
The hour I first believed
My chains are gone
I've been set free
My God, my Savior has ransomed me
And like a flood His mercy reigns
Unending love, Amazing grace

The Lord has promised good to me
His word my hope secures
He will my shield and portion be
As long as life endures

The earth shall soon dissolve like snow
The sun forbear to shine
But God, Who called me here below
Will be forever mine
Will be forever mine
You are forever mine

staying positive

2007-09-17T07:57:00.000-05:00

I need to stay positive. I need to stay positive. I need to say positive. I will stay positive. I will stay positive. I am staying positive.

Sometimes when something happens that we do not understand why it happens and we do not want it to happen... we, at lest I do, tend to get upset, mad at God, wonder why he would let something like this happen, depressed, etc. about it. But right now, I would think that I would be really really depressed, but I'm not THAT depressed.. just a little. I know that God has a plan for Duff. I know that God has a plan for our youth ministry. Everything happens for a reason... and we may not like what happens in the beginning, but the outcome is most of the time always more beautiful. Duff's whole situation really sucks, but we all need to stay positive about it and believe that God is in control and that everything happens for a reason. So I am going to try my best to stay positive about everything that is going on right now and encourage others to do the same.

Regener8 memories

2007-09-16T17:59:00.000-05:00

Today was Duff's last day as our youth minister. He had to quit because of some personal reasons... I was unable to go to church today because I might have strep... But I heard that the whole youth group was really emotional this morning. Even though I did not go to church, I still cried a lot and really hard. Duff is amazing. When we were looking for a new youth minister just about 1 1/2 years ago, God knew our needs within the youth ministry and not only did he give us an awesome guy with those qualities but also with many many more great qualities. Duff has been a huge blessing to our youth ministry and I hope that he still stays in contact with all of us in Regener8 at Harpeth Heights. Here are just a few pictures that I have put together as a "Thank you" to Duff. We love you, Duff! We will never forget you! Don't ever be a stranger!

A new attitude

2007-09-06T22:16:00.000-05:00

I feel like lately I have been trying to get people to feel sorry for me because of what I am going through right now. It usually worked, until this weekend. I was talking to a friend and trying to get her to feel feel sorry for me about this one situation that I am going through right now and it didn't work. Then I started thinking "Was I really trying to get her to feel sorry for me about this? Have I been trying to get everyone to feel sorry for me? Am I that desperate?" Then I started asking myself why I had been trying to get everyone to feel sorry for me, and I really didn't really realize why until last night. Duff was not there so he had gotten one of his friends, Kelly, to come and preach for him for a few weeks. Anyway, Kelly was talking about football and how when someone gets hit hard they still get back up.. or don't. Then he went on to saying how when we get hit hard with situations in life we need to get back up. A couple months ago I got hit hard with a few things and I never really got back up. I might have sat up, but I never fully got back up until last night. The past couple months I felt like I have been "stuck in a pit stop" as Kelly says, because I felt like I didn't the courage, the faith, the will, the power and the strength to get up and trust God to heal me and make everything better. I also felt like I didn't have the faith to trust that God had the situation under control and everything happens for a reason and He knows what is going to happen every second of the day. He knows what you are thinking right this very second, He knows what you will be doing and will be saying in 5 years, He knows your deepest and darkest secrets and He also knows weather or not you take the time to care for your neighbor. Last night I realized that I can get up with God's help and only with God's help. I now have the courage to take a stand against this world and everything that it may throw my way, only because I know that God is my fortress, my shield and my protection. My faith in God right now is I think stronger than it has ever been. I am now more willing than ever to get back up and take a stand against this world and all the crap that it may throw my way. Through God I have the power to withstand and overcome so many temptations that I may have. I am now stronger in Christ, so now if I get hit hard, I will be able to stay standing because God has given me the strength. One thing that I have learned over the years, is that I can do NOTHING and I am NOTHING without God! God truly fulfills me and all my desires. God alone is the only one that can do that!!

So true to me

2007-08-30T10:57:00.000-05:00

I was looking through all the songs we have on our computer and I saw this one, I had never heard of the artist before so I decide to listen to it.... I was listening to it and I just started crying because it is so true to me right now! I was talking to my best friend later on that evening and she said "yeah, that song does sound like you..."

LITTLE BIG TOWN LYRICS

"Stay"

How can I bear to wake up and you're not there
What will I do when I turn and reach for you
I'll lay my tears on the windowsill
I'll only cry till i get over you
But how long will that take me
Won't you save me... and

[Chorus:]
Stay
Just a little bit longer
Till I'm a little bit stronger to take all this
Stay
Just a little more time
Till I can find a way
Please stay

Will I ever smile again
When loosing love takes my best friend
To wonder where, wonder how
Wonder what you're doing
One more night just before you break me
Hold me safely

[Chorus]

So I'll be a big girl, and just close my eyes
As you walk away don't say goodbye
God save me
Please won't you

[Chorus]

My life song

2007-08-22T21:00:00.000-05:00

This is like my life song right now. When I first heard this song, the first two lines really caught my attention, because I've had to say goodbye to so many people that I love that have moved in the past few years... The rest of the song really talks about crying out to God when you're in pain, running to Him when you need comfort and giving Him your whole life. So that is one reason this is like one of my life songs right now. I LOVE it so much!!

BARLOW GIRL LYRICS

"Here's My Life"

Once again I said my goodbyes
To those who I love most
My heart feels that familiar pain
As I long for home
'Cause this road is hard
When I feel so far

God I'm crying out tonight
'Cause I've given You my life
But I'm tired and I'm missing what's behind
So once more here's my life

On the day that You called my name
All that I knew changed
I found when I said yes that I'd never be the same
Though the call is hard
You are worth it all

God I'm crying out tonight
'Cause I've given You my life
But I'm tired and I'm missing what's behind
So once more

Even when the tears are falling
When I find I fear the calling
You remind me
Words You've spoken over my life
Promises I've yet to see
You comfort me

God I'm crying out tonight
'Cause I've given You my life
But I'm tired and I'm missing what's behind
So once more, here's my life

"Who You'd Be Today" by Kenny Chesney

2007-08-06T12:41:00.000-05:00

"Who You'd Be Today" KENNY CHESNEY

Sunny days seem to hurt the most.
I wear the pain like a heavy coat.
I feel you everywhere I go.
I see your smile, I see your face,
I hear you laughin' in the rain.
I still can't believe you're gone.

It ain't fair: you died too young,
Like the story that had just begun,
But death tore the pages all away.
God knows how I miss you,
All the hell that I've been through,
Just knowin' no-one could take your place.
An' sometimes I wonder,
Who'd you be today?

Would you see the world? Would you chase your dreams?
Settle down with a family,
I wonder what would you name your babies?
Some days the sky's so blue,
I feel like I can talk to you,
An' I know it might sound crazy.

It ain't fair: you died too young,
Like the story that had just begun,
But death tore the pages all away.
God knows how I miss you,
All the hell that I've been through,
Just knowin' no-one could take your place.
An' sometimes I wonder,
Who you'd be today?

Today, today, today.
Today, today, today.

[Instrumental Break]

Sunny days seem to hurt the most.
I wear the pain like a heavy coat.
The only thing that gives me hope,
Is I know I'll see you again some day.

Some day, some day, some day.

In the middle of me by Todd Agnew

2007-08-06T09:25:00.000-05:00

This song keeps ringing true in my ears. I feel like I have been putting
God off, like I've been putting other stuff before God. I've been really
busy this summer, but is that a reason to put God on hold? of course
not! I don't want to be putting God second in my life anymore like I
have been most of the summer, I want him FIRST in my life!!

   God, please forgive me for not putting you first in my life this summer,
Please help me to keep you first right now and forever! It has been so
hard to get through just a week without keeping you my top priority! 



In the middle of me by Todd Agnew

I need a little more sunshine in the middle of rain
Need a little more joy in the middle of pain
Need a little more color in the middle of this plain jane

I’ve looked as deep as I can see
And I think I need a little more You in the middle of me

I need a little more patience in the middle of stress
I need a little more beauty in the middle of this mess
Need a little more substance in the middle of this emptiness

I’ve looked as deep as I can see
And I think I need a little more You in the middle of me

Need more of You and less of me
More of You and little less insanity
More of You and little less complexity

I’ve looked as deep as I can see
It seems more of You is better for me

I need a little more rhythm in the middle of this lazy rhyme
Need a little more spontaneity in the middle of this daily grind
Need a little more truth not music in this world of lies

I’ve looked as deep as I can see
And I think I need a little more You in the middle of me

Just a little bit of what is on my heart right now

2007-07-31T21:53:00.000-05:00

Don't you hate it when you have so much on your mind that you don't know what to write? I sure do. I miss my friends! I have been gone like almost all summer so I have not gotten to see them, but now I am done with camps... well for 2007 at least! hehe. I have had fun meeting new friends and getting to know other people from around the state, but after not being home for more than 3 days at a time I started to miss my friends and family... especially my brother, Ryan. It was weird not being around my brother most of the summer... I mean we are twins so we have pretty much spent all of our lives together. I was thinking just the other day about when we go off to college... I'm gonna miss my brother! Someone I really miss is Jonathan Rainwater. I have not seen him for almost a month and have not really talked to him since he went back to Georgia, he is not answering his phone, calling me back, or even replying to emails... I know he is probably really busy but why can't he at least say that he is doing good and that he has been busy and cant really talk.... but no he can't even do that. I've asked my other friends that were close to Jon while he was here if they have talked to him for awhile and they said no. We miss you, Jon!!! I've had so much happen to me this past year. I am no longer allowed to talk to one of my old close friends because she was tired of hiding secrets from her parents and she said that she was going to come out and tell them everything and I guess she made up a lie about me and we are no longer allowed to talk to each other. One of my brothers moved to New Zealand for a year. Two of my best friends/mentors moved. One of my best friends/mentors is pregnant and I have not seen her for over 9 months and I haven't really gotten to congratulate her with a hug yet... That is just some stuff that I have been upset about but here is the good stuff is... I was the runner up for my citizenship record book in state, i was the state winner in my poultry record book, i won a $500 scholarship, I've gotten to know this really awesome guy I call "my big brother" Jon Rainwater, Two of my best friends/mentors are going to seminary answering God's call for their life, and a lot more. All I can say is that god is the best! Nothing good or bad would have happened without him! Some of the stuff I did not want to happen but God has everything under control and everything happens for a reason... we may never know why God wanted the people to move or why he wanted something to happen... God is great! This is just a little bit of what is on my heart right now.

A little bit of everything...

2007-07-04T21:30:00.000-05:00

Okay, lately I have been making idols out people that I honestly did not mean to. I was really Idolizing Jeremy and Sarah right before they left and then I like just started idolizing Jon... But before it got out of control, God kind of said "Holly, you are starting to do idolize Jon just like you were with Jeremy and Sarah..." and I just stopped what I was doing and was thinking about it and I was and so I prayed about it and spent time alone with God and I've gotta tell you that the past few days I have been in a GREAT mood and while I was idolizing them it was like I was not always "happy" and I never really felt "fulfilled". But Sunday like I said I spent some time alone with God and I've been so incredibly happy and I've felt so alive in Christ ever since! It's totally amazing! God is AMAZING!

Two weeks ago when Jeremy and Sarah moved to Louisville, I was so depressed for awhile after words, and Jon was loving me with God's love, He comforted me, encouraged me, and he was there for me anytime of day and night. It really means a lot to me to know that my friends care for me and love me. But it means a lot more to me to know that God is ALWAYS there for me! He is the only one that will NEVER let me down! Even the people that I do not think will let me down, will let me down sometime. God is good all the time; all the time God is good!

I just got back from the 4-H 2007 National Shooting Sports Shoot and if you want to read more about it read the blog I did before this one. I am going on a mission trip this week and the next two weeks I'll be at a camp.

I pray that God will work in your life right now and always. I pray that He will bless you beyond belief and always keep you safe. I pray that He will comfort you, love you, and that you will lean on Him for anything and EVERY need you have in your life. He is the only way we can make it through life. When we think we can make it through on our own is when we need God the most. God is the ONLY one that can fulfill our EVERY need and He is the only one that will NEVER let us down! No matter what you are going through, God is there!

Nationals

2007-07-03T08:06:00.000-05:00

This past week I competed in Air Rifle at the 2007 National 4-H shooting sports contest in South Dakota. Even though I did not place real high in the placings, I shot the best that I have ever shot and I'm very proud of myself for doing that and sticking to it when when I did not want to. On the way there we stopped to take a picture at the South Dakota border and these horses came running up to us so we went to pet them! They were so pretty! One of the days we were there we went to see Mt. Rushmore and it is so pretty there! I had a really good time. One of the days we went to this water fall thing where gold miners were digging and all the sudden the water started like flowing out and so now there is this really pretty water fall there. Then after that we went to play put-put which was a blast! There was this Air Rifle team from Florida at Nationals and they were
so nice to us! They encouraged us to shoot when we did not want to and they were probably the nicest team there. They asked us to the dance on the last night but we did not stay for it because we had like a 6-8 hour drive ahead of us then we had two flights the next day so my mom would not let us stay then after we told them that we were not staying for the dance that night they asked us if we wanted to go see a movie right after we were done shooting before we left but my mom still didn't let us stay a few more hours for that and they got really disappointed that we could not stay. They were so nice and cute! lol. :) While we were driving to the hotel that night, we drove kinda around/through this really bad thunder storm and it looked like a few clouds were gonna be tornado's and it was pretty freaky! I absolutely loved the sunset after the storm! I had a really good time at Nationals! I just really missed everyone back here at home!!!

"Beauty From Pain" by Superchick

2007-06-14T23:17:00.000-05:00

SUPERCHICK LYRICS

"Beauty From Pain"

The lights go out all around me
One last candle to keep out the night
And then the darkness surrounds me
I know i'm alive but i feel like i've died
And all that's left is to accept that it's over
My dreams ran like sand through the fists that i made
I try to keep warm but i just grow colder
I feel like i'm slipping away

After all this has passed, i still will remain
After i've cried my last, there'll be beauty from pain
Though it won't be today,
Someday i'll hope again
And there'll be beauty from pain
You will bring beauty from my pain

My whole world is the pain inside me
The best i can do is just get through the day
When life before is only a memory
I'll wonder why God lets me walk through this place
And though i can't understand why this happened
I know that i will when i look back someday
And see how you've brought beauty from ashes
And made me as gold purified through these flames

After all this has passed, i still will remain
After i've cried my last, there'll be beauty from pain
Though it won't be today,
Someday i'll hope again
And there'll be beauty from pain
You will bring beauty from my pain

Here i am, at the end of me
Tryin to hold to what i can't see
I forgot how to hope
This night's been so long
I cling to Your promise
There will be a dawn

After all this has passed, i still will remain
After i've cried my last, there'll be beauty from pain
Though it won't be today,
Someday i'll hope again
And there'll be beauty from pain
You will bring beauty from my pain

I can't explain

2007-05-31T20:19:00.000-05:00

I can't explain how I feel right now, for I am not sure for myself. I am happy, so happy that no words can come close to describing this feeling. I do not know about you, but after I cry about something that has gone really wrong, or someone that has died, moved, or just have lost contact with, after I cry out to God with all my heart about it, I usually feel better about it. For instance, the other night at Summer Fest '07 when Todd Agnew was singing this one song towards the end of the night, the only words that I can remember are "hallelujah hallelujah we come to bring you honor" something like that, but before we started singing it, Todd said something like "While we are singing this song I want you guys to think about the anger, the pain, the sorrow or whatever else that you might have on your heart right now and I just want you to turn it over to God right now, cry out to Him in your heart but sing hallelujah with me..." During the song my friend pulled on my arm and wanted me to kneel down and pray with her and while I was praying, I started to cry my eyes out! I was crying for the whole song mainly because of this one situation that is going on in my life right now...But after words, I felt so much better, I mean I have cried about it before, but not like this, I have not really come before God in the way I came before God with it. About half way through the song, I felt as if someone had wrapped their arms around me and was just giving me this huge hug and comforting me at the came time... but there was no one there... it was God! I was crying on my father's shoulder, inside his loving hug! Let me say, I felt so much better after I prayed and cried about it, I can not explain the great mood I am in right now. I have never really felt this way before. I'm lovin it! All I can say are these three words: God is GREAT!!! Can I get an Amen to that?!?!

fun times

2007-05-27T20:54:00.000-05:00

Once a year our church has a picnic. We get together have ourselves some food, play some music, play crazy games, laugh, goof off, we get to come together and be our crazy selves, but most of all we are coming together with our Christian friends and fellowshipping with each other. we have a grand old time! One of my favorite parts of the church picnic is getting to get together with some of the people that I do not usually get to see or hang out with and getting to be on a sports team with them for the night, or just being able to talk to the folks that I do not really get to see that often.... or will not be able to see that often... I wish we could have it more than just once a year! Everyone enjoys themselves and you have the opportunity to talk to people that you never really talk to.

2007-05-26T12:09:00.000-05:00

The other day I was in a really bad mood and I just felt as if no one really cared, I wanted to start crying and never stop... But instead of crying until I could not cry anymore, I ran to my heavenly father, I asked Him to comfort me and take care of me. Then I started to read this book called "Enjoying the closeness of God" and the title of the chapter I was reading was "Growing when I am all alone" and some stuff in that chapter really hit me like a brick upside the head. It was very convicting, and it was what I need to read then. And later I was listening to my radio and their verse for the day was Romans 5:1 "Therefore, since we have been justified through faith, we have peace with God through our Lord Jesus Christ" I don't know what to say, that is just what I needed to hear then. All I can say is that we have an awesome God!!! He cares about us even when we think no one does and He does not want us to hurt, because when we hurt He hurts also! So next time you feel as if no one cares, remember that God cares! He is the ONLY one that will NEVER let us down. He is the ONLY one that will NEVER leave us! God loves you!!

Sometimes...

2007-05-07T12:31:00.000-05:00

Life sometimes seems like we are down in a deep dark hole crying for help with no one coming to our aid. Sometimes it seems like we are in an open field in the middle of a lot of flowers just as happy as can be. But sometimes it seems like we are in the middle of nowhere just waiting for the next thing to come along. Right now I kind of feel like I am left just waiting for something to come along. Things come and go, sometimes I could really care less, but sometimes it hurts so bad that it seems like nothing could ever be right again. It seems like whenever I have a problem with something or someone I tend to run to my friends and mentors for help first, instead of God. This is something I am working on, but I have to be honest and admit that when I have a problem I do not think to run to God first with it. This is very convicting writing this. For me life sometimes seems really crappy when actually it is not crappy at all! Its the little stuff that I let get to me the most. One thing I am afraid of is losing my friends, to both distance and death. I do not know how I would get through life without my friends. I need my friends to help me, encourage me, pray with me about stuff, and to tell me if I am doing something wrong that I do not realize I am doing. Having good Christian friends is a blessing from God! We all need encouragement from others to get through life. I was to thank all of my friends and family that has encouraged me and helped me through tough times in my life. Thank you! I love you!

Making memories

2007-05-07T11:29:00.000-05:00

This past Saturday night Jacquelyn and I spent the night at Jeremy and Sarah's house. I was the happiest I had been in a long while. There were points where I about started crying... o, wait, I did start crying a couple times... but that was not because they are moving next month, but because of something else. I have not laughed that hard and that much for a really long time. I had a great time!! I do not want them to move, but I know that they are listening to God and God wants them to go to Seminary. So I will be supportive about it, even if it hurts more than anything else that has happened to me yet. Even if it feels like I can not go on, I will find strength from God to press on. :) I love Jeremy and Sarah so much!!!! I am so glad that God brought them into my life! They mean so much to me!! I love you guys so much!!! Thank you so much for everything!

Rush Of Fools - Undo

2007-05-01T16:02:00.000-05:00

Undo is kind of personal to me (haha, that makes it sound like I wrote it. lol.). It reminds me that Jesus can undo anything we have done and that he can make everything alright. And it reminds me that we can not do anything by ourselves, we NEED Jesus in our lives!

Rush Of Fools - Undo
From the album Rush Of Fools

I've been here before, now here I am again
Standing at the door, praying You'll let me back in
To label me a prodigal would be
Only scratching the surface of who I've been known to be

Chorus

Turn me around pick me up
Undo what I've become
Bring me back to the place
Of forgiveness and grace
I need You, need Your help
I can't do this myself
You’re the only one who can undo
What I've become

I focused on the score, but I could never win
Trying to ignore, a life of hiding my sin
To label me a hypocrite would be
Only scratching the surface of who I've been known to be

Turn me around pick me up
Undo what I've become
Bring me back to the place
Of forgiveness and grace
I need You, need Your help
I can't do this myself
You’re the only one who can undo
What I've become

Make every step lead me back to
The sovereign way that You

Turn me around pick me up
Undo what I've become
Bring me back to the place
Of forgiveness and grace
I need You, need Your help
I can't do this myself
You’re the only one who can undo
What I've become

Enough by Chris Tomlin

2007-05-01T15:45:00.002-05:00

I love this song because it is so true to me! God is more than enough for me. I have been going through this phase in life, where I want more in life, I want more fulfillment, but this song reminds me that I do not need all that "extra" stuff. All I need right now and all I will ever need is God. And he is more than enough for me!

"Enough" by Chris Tomlin

All of You is more than enough for all of me
For every thirst and every need
You satisfy me with Your love
And all I have in You is more than enough

You are my supply
My breath of life
And still more awesome than I know
You are my reward
worth living for
And still more awesome than I know

All of You is more than enough for all of me
For every thirst and every need
You satisfy me with Your love
And all I have in You is more than enough

Youre my sacrifice
Of greatest price
And still more awesome than I know
Youre the coming King
You are everything
And still more awesome than I know

More than all I want
More than all I need
You are more than enough for me
More than all I know
More than all I can say
You are more than enough for me

Psalm 139

2007-05-01T15:40:00.000-05:00

I like this passage because it reminds me that everything we do, everywhere we go, God is ALWAYS with us. There is NOTHING we can do without him. Even when it seems like everything bad is happening to you, when it seems like God is one hundred miles away, God is testing your faithfulness to Him.

Psalm 139

For the director of music. Of David. A psalm.

1 O LORD, you have searched me
and you know me.

2 You know when I sit and when I rise;
you perceive my thoughts from afar.

3 You discern my going out and my lying down;
you are familiar with all my ways.

4 Before a word is on my tongue
you know it completely, O LORD.

5 You hem me in—behind and before;
you have laid your hand upon me.

6 Such knowledge is too wonderful for me,
too lofty for me to attain.

7 Where can I go from your Spirit?
Where can I flee from your presence?

8 If I go up to the heavens, you are there;
if I make my bed in the depths, ^[a] you are there.

9 If I rise on the wings of the dawn,
if I settle on the far side of the sea,

10 even there your hand will guide me,
your right hand will hold me fast.

11 If I say, "Surely the darkness will hide me
and the light become night around me,"

12 even the darkness will not be dark to you;
the night will shine like the day,
for darkness is as light to you.

13 For you created my inmost being;
you knit me together in my mother's womb.

14 I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made;
your works are wonderful,
I know that full well.

15 My frame was not hidden from you
when I was made in the secret place.
When I was woven together in the depths of the earth,

16 your eyes saw my unformed body.
All the days ordained for me
were written in your book
before one of them came to be.

17 How precious to ^[b] me are your thoughts, O God!
How vast is the sum of them!

18 Were I to count them,
they would outnumber the grains of sand.
When I awake,
I am still with you.

19 If only you would slay the wicked, O God!
Away from me, you bloodthirsty men!

20 They speak of you with evil intent;
your adversaries misuse your name.

21 Do I not hate those who hate you, O LORD,
and abhor those who rise up against you?

22 I have nothing but hatred for them;
I count them my enemies.

23 Search me, O God, and know my heart;
test me and know my anxious thoughts.

24 See if there is any offensive way in me,
and lead me in the way everlasting.

If we knew...

2007-04-23T22:19:00.000-05:00

If we knew that the world was going to end in one week, what would be the top 10 things you would do?? Think about it... Here is what I would do...
1) Say sorry to everyone I have ever hurt and ask for forgiveness
2) Tell everyone that I love them
3) Share God with as many people as I can
4) Live my life showing God's love
5) Go and see everyone that I have not seen in a long time
6) Go on a long car ride with all of my girlfriends
7) Go to the highest mountain top and scream at the top of my lungs that I love Jesus and he is my Lord and Savior!
8) Get a few penguins
9) Pet a tiger
10) Tell my parents that I am sorry for everything

I want to ask everyone I have ever hurt to please forgive me! I am so sorry for everything I have done. I love you!!! I want to tell as many people as I can that Jesus loves them and that he is Lord and Savior. One thing I always try my best to do is show God's love with everyone I meet. I do not always do it, but I try. I want to see the people that I have not seen in a long time, because we don't know what will happen...Something that I have always wanted to do is go on a LONG car ride across country with just my girlfriends. Something I REALLY want to do sometime is go to a really high mountain and scream at the top of my lungs that Jesus is my Lord and Savior. I want to get a few penguins for a couple reasons. Because they are like awesome and they remind me of my two best friends!!! Something I really need to do sometime soon is tell my parents that I am sorry for everything. First I need to get the courage to do so. Well, actually I need to ask God to help me with it, because I can do nothing on my own, everything I do is only possible with the help of God. So... "God, please help me build up the courage to tell my parents that I am sorry for everything that I have every done to them. Amen."

This one is to Jeremy and Sarah...

2007-04-03T22:36:00.000-05:00

I do not want to say goodbye, but I know that I must. It is not goodbye forever, just for awhile. When I know that I can call you anytime I want or need to talk, It is just not the same. i will miss your hug and smile, But it is time to share your loving hug and cheerful smile with other people. It is your time to take that next step in life. God has bigger and better plans laid in place for your life. Even though it may hurt on the inside, I will try my best not to show how much it really hurts on the outside. I will have to accept the fact that where you will be going is where the Lord wants you to be. I will be happy or at least try my best to be happy because you will be fulfilling God's good and perfect will for your life. God brought you into my life for a reason, and now he is going to put into other peoples lives for a reason. Everything the Lord does has a reason and a purpose, even though we may not understand at the time, we must put our trust in the Lord. If we obey the Lord, He will bless us. He sure has blessed me by placing you in my life. I do not know where I would be if He had not put you in my life to love, help and encourage me. So when you go onto new places, please do remember me, for i will never forget you. How can I forget you? You are a blessing and one of a kind! I thank God for you! I love you!!!

Friends

2007-03-30T12:15:00.000-05:00

Friends have such a huge inmact on my life. I love all my friends so much! I have a great time with them, and when I am not with them I am thinking about them and praying that they have a great day. It hurts really bad when one of my friends move. One of my best friends moved to dickson a few years ago and they quit coming to our church and we didnt talk for awhile and now we talk almost every week on AIM. One of my bestest friends ever moved to Jackson last year in January. It has been really hard because we are both really busy and so we can't talk that much and I miss her so much! Another of my bestest friends ever and one of my mentors will be moving in a few months and this time it hurts the worst because God has used her so much in my life and she means so much to me! I love her and her husbend so much!! I praise God that they are all doing what he wants them to be doing. =D

Never Say Goodbye

2007-03-30T12:01:00.000-05:00

Never Say Goodbye by Rebecca L. Adkins

I feel the time is getting close,
When we will have to part.
I'll show you that I'll miss you,
With last words from my heart.

We must be dreaming,
For time has gone by to fast.
The time we have spent together,
Will soon be our past.

I'll forget this day is coming,
Today I stand here.
Trying to tell you,
How much I really care.

We will go out separate ways,
And I'll make it if I try.
Just hold on to our memories,
Say Never, Say Goodbye!!!!

Missing a friend by Dana Hanon

2007-03-30T11:51:00.000-05:00

This one is to Carly...

Missing a friend by Dana Hanon

We were close friends
I believed you were sent from above
I knew I could count on you
For anything I needed
And when I needed you the most
You were always there
Till the day you moved away
But I knew you stilled cared
For we can still be friends
Only from a distance
through phone lines we'd talk
Did not make the difference
We were still friends
Even through long distances
I do miss our sleepovers
And the pranks you'd pull
And our long talks and
Our laughs we used to share
And how you made me feel better
Just by being there
I miss you my friend
And I know that you still care
We are friends forever
You and I
Friends till the end.

To my best friend by Kiah K. Chonko

2007-03-30T11:32:00.000-05:00

To my best friend by Kiah K. Chonko

I was sitting here thinking
of the words I want to say,
but they wouldn't come out right
so i found a different way

i got a piece of paper
and wrote this poem for you,
but there is no way to thank you
for everything you do

for always being nice to me
and staying by my side,
for helping fix my problems
and never leaving me behind

for accepting my thoughts and feelings,
though you did not understand,
for never giving up on me
and being my best friend

For making me laugh
and letting me cry
and saying that you'd miss me

everything you mean to me
you could never know
in all the ways you have changed my life
I could never show

The way you take care of me,
you're my shining star
and though it's so increible
that's the way you are

Before I get too mushy
it's time for me to go,
and before I leave this ink-filled page
there is one more thing you should know

As long as we are living,
no matter when or where,
if ever you need me
just call and I will be there

i'll climb a thousand mountians
and swim a thousand seas
anything to be there for you
'cause you've been there for me.

Life by Benjamin K. Kotey

2007-03-30T10:40:00.000-05:00

Life by Benjamin K. Kotey

It takes a day to day to make a dream,
But it takes many nights for a seed to become a tree.

Life is a ladder that must be climbed.
But in every stage,

There are many rivers and battles to fight
And our hope determines our future.

Life is a trip through the wilderness
And everyone must survive for success.

And without a determination
We can never reach our destination.

There are many roads in life,
But choice

Stands between the broad and the narrow.
But the world is not only what we see

But what we hear
Life is time and time is tide.

We are making an endless journey
But no ladder is without an end

Problems may fall like rain
But every seed has its seasons.

Sometimes I wonder why

2007-03-08T10:52:00.000-06:00

Sometimes I wonder why the Lord has decided to bless me so much with the people he has put in my life. Even though people come into my life and walk out, I can not help but to be thankful for them. Every person that has ever come into my life has taught me something different. Even though it hurts to lose one of my best friends, one of my mentors, and my big sister in Christ, I am thankful that they are doing what the Lord wants them to do. Besides God, I think that friends are life's greatest treasure. If someone has had an impact on your life, do not let them go! Hold onto them. No matter if you live next door to them or you live hundreds of miles away, do not let go.

Psalm 34

2007-03-01T12:42:00.000-06:00

1 I will extol the LORD at all times;
his praise will always be on my lips.

2 My soul will boast in the LORD;
let the afflicted hear and rejoice.

3 Glorify the LORD with me;
let us exalt his name together.

4 I sought the LORD, and he answered me;
he delivered me from all my fears.

5 Those who look to him are radiant;
their faces are never covered with shame.

6 This poor man called, and the LORD heard him;
he saved him out of all his troubles.

7 The angel of the LORD encamps around those who fear him,
and he delivers them.

8 Taste and see that the LORD is good;
blessed is the man who takes refuge in him.

9 Fear the LORD, you his saints,
for those who fear him lack nothing.

10 The lions may grow weak and hungry,
but those who seek the LORD lack no good thing.

11 Come, my children, listen to me;
I will teach you the fear of the LORD.

12 Whoever of you loves life
and desires to see many good days,

13 keep your tongue from evil
and your lips from speaking lies.

14 Turn from evil and do good;
seek peace and pursue it.

15 The eyes of the LORD are on the righteous
and his ears are attentive to their cry;

16 the face of the LORD is against those who do evil,
to cut off the memory of them from the earth.

17 The righteous cry out, and the LORD hears them;
he delivers them from all their troubles.

18 The LORD is close to the brokenhearted
and saves those who are crushed in spirit.

19 A righteous man may have many troubles,
but the LORD delivers him from them all;

20 he protects all his bones,
not one of them will be broken.

21 Evil will slay the wicked;
the foes of the righteous will be condemned.

22 The LORD redeems his servants;
no one will be condemned who takes refuge in him.

Give it to the Lord

2007-03-01T11:10:00.000-06:00

When it seems like all else fades away, and when it seems like nothing could
ever be right or even be the same again, remember, there is a God who's been
faithful and true and he will bring you through any situation you are in, He's
just waiting for you to cry out to him for help. When it seems like you can't
make it another day, just hold on and bring it to the Lord and lay it down onto
his hands and give him permission to do with it as he pleases, after all, He
does work for the good of those who love him. There is no point in living if
you are not living for him!

Team Impact

2007-02-15T09:10:00.000-06:00

One word.. Come! Team Impact is a great opportunity to hear the best news and advice you will ever get the chance to hear and it is also a great performance. These guys break breaks, bend stuff that is not meant to be bent, and a lot more... but the best part of the whole night is when they share the gospel with you! It is a vary moving performance! Check out the info on our church website..

http://harpethheights.org/templates/System/details.asp?id=27543&PG=Events&CID=539840&rDate=2007-02-14

Clarity 07!!

2007-02-06T16:36:00.000-06:00

What can I say? CLARITY WAS AWESOME!!!!! It was so good! It made me feel guilty for not spending enough time reading my Bible, spending that much time with God everyday, and for being as selfish as I am. Why spend all day on the computer, watching TV, etc. When you can be making a difference in the world? When you can be sharing the best news with kids at school, with coworkers, with complete strangers. So my prayer for you is that you spend more time in God's word, you spend more time alone with God everyday, that you have the courage to share the best news with someone this week, next week and forever! I love you! Have a great week!

my 2007 4-H speech

2007-01-11T12:05:00.000-06:00

Can you remember some of the very first songs you ever learned? One of the
first ones I can remember is “Jesus Loves the Little Children.” This song was
especially popular in many American churches after WWII and emphasizes the
ideal of God’s love reaching out to every race. Although I didn’t know and
understand all the words for many years, the words “Red and Yellow, Black and
White, they are precious in His sight” have a real meaning to me today. Why?
Because the words remind me that we cannot live with prejudice in our hearts.

Noah Webster, in his 1828 publication of the American Dictionary of the English
Language defined prejudice as a prejudgment; an opinion or decision of the
mind, formed without due examination of the facts. As I grow older and study
the history and culture of our society, I can’t help but recognize how
prejudice can push people apart from one another. We must work to bring people
together. Let’s look at three examples of prejudice and how it was overcome.

Jane Austen was born in 1775, the seventh of eight children, and was taught by
her minister father at home. She lived her first 26 years in the safety and
seclusion of the rectory. Although her life was uneventful and very placid,
she was highly sensitive to what went on around her. Her observations were
incorporated in her novels. Pride and Prejudice, Austen’s most popular novel,
portrays the life of two classy, opinionated young people (Elizabeth Bennet and
Mr. Darcy), who were not initially enchanted with each other. Throughout the
novel, they come to really appreciate and even love each other because of the
ways in which their similarities and differences do work together. Pride and
Prejudice was first published in 1813, but the original version of the novel
was written in 1796-1797 under the title of “First Impressions.” The
characters in her novel are universal and timeless. First impressions are a
leading cause of prejudice.

Now let’s examine Abraham Lincoln - our 16th President and the Great
Emancipator. At the age of 19, he and another young man took a flatboat of
farm produce down the Mississippi River to New Orleans. While on this trip,
they fought off a robbery attempt by seven black men and a slave auction in New
Orleans. On his return flatboat trip to New Orleans three years later, and
saw the same slave abuse again. And years later, while on a steamboat trip to
Kentucky, he saw 12 slaves chained together. The prejudice that many white men
shared about blacks was upsetting to Lincoln. He was once quoted as saying, “
Whenever I hear anyone arguing for slavery, I feel a strong impulse to try it
on him personally.”

Abraham Lincoln is credited for the abolishment of slavery in the United
States. He often spoke out against slavery - long before the Civil War broke
out. Years later, in his Gettysburg Address, Lincoln spoke these words:

“Four score and seven years ago our fathers brought forth on this continent a
new nation, conceived in Liberty, and dedicated to the proposition that all men
are created equal.”

He didn’t have any prejudice against the black man. In his eyes, everyone was
created equal and deserving of a free life.

Now let’s look at the life of Mother Teresa. She was known as a peacemaker, a
pioneer, a legend. Born in 1910 in the former Yugoslavia, she was the youngest
of three children. She became interested in missionary work during her youth.
At the age of 17, she responded to her first call as a Catholic missionary
nun. She received her second call to leave the covenant and work with the poor
at the age of 34. She was quoted as saying, ”I knew where I belonged but I did
not know how to get there."

Four years later, in 1948, the Vatican granted her permission to leave and
pursue her calling. Mother Teresa started a school in the slums to teach the
children of the poor. She also learned basic medicine and went into the homes
of the sick to treat them. In 1949, some of her former pupils joined her. They
found men, women, and children dying on the streets who were rejected by local
hospitals. The group rented a room so they could care for helpless people
otherwise condemned to die in the gutter.

Over the years, Mother Teresa’s Missionaries of Charity grew from twelve to
thousands serving the "poorest of the poor" in 450 centers around the world.
She created many homes for the dying and the unwanted from Calcutta to New York
to Albania and was one of the pioneers of establishing homes for AIDS victims.
For more than 45 years, Mother Teresa comforted the poor, the dying, and the
unwanted around the world.

Pope John Paul II said this: "Mother Teresa marked the history of our century
with courage. She served all human beings by promoting their dignity and
respect, and made those who had been defeated by life feel the tenderness of
God.”

None of these examples allowed prejudice to push people apart from one
another. They all worked to bring people together.

The characters in Jane Austen’s novel learned to accept and appreciate their
differences.

Abraham Lincoln had a difficult childhood, and was exposed to the reality of
slavery in ways we probably can never imagine. He taught us the value of
treating others as human beings, with no prejudice feelings.

Mother Teresa had the benefit to be part of a youth group in her teen years, a
group that helped in the development of her personal and spiritual growth. She
taught us to love, to treat one another with utmost respect, without
prejudice.

Today, you and I have the opportunity to be part of the largest youth
development organization in the nation, where we can experience many areas of
real life. 4-H is open to all students regardless of race, sex, national
origin, or disability. In 4-H, each one of us can make a difference in the
lives of many - without prejudice. Let’s follow the examples set before us so
that we can become leaders with global perspectives and intercultural
understanding, with a dedication to serve those rejected by the world.

I close by sharing these words of Mother Teresa:
"Keep the joy of loving the poor and share this joy with all you meet. Remember
works of love are works of Peace. God Bless you."

A couple poems I wrote

2007-01-11T11:32:00.000-06:00

I wrote this poem as if God were saying it..

I'll be there
I'll be there in tough times in your life. When there's pain, when there's sorrow, when it seems like no one else is there, I'll be there right by your side. I'll be there in the good times in your life. When there's laughter, when there's joy, when there's just plain silence, I'll be there right by your side. When there's grief, when there's tears of joy, I'll be there.

This one is kinda personal for me, I wrote it when I was worried about having one of my friends move away..

Don't worry, trust in the Lord

Don't worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow has enough worries of its own. Don't worry about what is going to come. Everything has a purpose, Everything has a reason. No matter what happens, Keep your Faith, be happy and rejoice. For the Lord has everything under control and everything planed out just the way he wants it. No matter how hard something seems, trust in the Lord.

Friends

2006-11-06T19:00:00.000-06:00

Friends are blessings from God! True friends will always be there for you anytime, anywhere and will do anything for you! They encourage you to do the right thing, they encourage you with your walk with God, there are to just hang and be stupid with, and they will keep your secrets to themselfs.

Mentors are also blessings from God! For me they would be Sarah and Carly! Two of my closest friends, awesome christian women! I love them to death! They have encouraged me so much to do the right thing and stick to the narrow path way, And keep my relationship with God as strong as I can!

Adam Duffy will be our full time youth pastor on January 1st!!! He has been part time since easter time. He is defiantly God sent! God has worked through Duff so much in our youth group! God has changed the youth in our youth group so much in the past few months! Its awesome! God is AWESOME!!!! God's the BEST!!!!!

Isn't it funny?

2006-10-29T22:29:00.000-06:00

Isn't it funny how you don't realize how much you miss someone until you see them and then you don't see them for a while? That is one of the hardest things for me.. Having one of my bestest friends ever move.. But at the sametime I know that God wants them where they are and they played their part in my life and still are.. You have to try really hard to keep your relationship strong, but you have to try even harder when you don't get to see each other that often.. I had a friend once, and we were like best friends, then one of us moved, and we barley talk anymore.. But with the people I'm talking about right now, we still talk, and we see each other every once in a while.. But what I'm trying to say is.. You have to fight for what you want and need.

But what you really need, is God. He loves you so much that he sent his only son to die for your sins, so you didnt have to.

Serving others while having fun!

2006-10-22T21:01:00.000-05:00

Hey!!!!! Do you ever think that serving others is not fun??? I think that it is really fun!!! I really enjoy serving others! I get all happy and hyper after I do.. I feel like I've done something for them and I've shown them some of God's glory! You know what I mean? Tonight at church, we had a banquet and our youth group served dinner to everyone, I had a blast! It may not seem fun at the time, but after words, Don't you feel like you've done something to help someone?? Serving other people is just something I really enjoy. When I'm serving others, I'm not doing something for myself, I don't feel selfish!! I feel all good inside! I feel like i'm serving God... you know what i mean??

I LOVE MY FRIENDS!!!! I could not begin to imagin where i would be without them!! they have encouraged me so much with my walk with God.. I LOVE THEM!!!

My 2006 4-H Speech

2006-10-10T08:18:00.000-05:00

Freedom is not Free by Holly Stewart

Freedom. What is freedom?...the condition of being free; the power to act, think or speak without restraints; unrestricted, unconfined. American freedom. That's the part of our heritage American troops have fought to protect all over the world.

Presisent George W. Bush said this while addressing students and teachers observing Veterans Day in our Nation's Schools two years ago: "As Americans, we look to our veterans as examples of honor and patriotism. throughout our history, loyal citizens have assumed the duty of military life and built a great tradition of courageous and faithful service. From World War 1 and World War 11, the the conflicts in Korea, Vietnam, and the Persian Gulf, to the recent battles against terror in Afghanistan and Iraq, our troops have made our country safer and brought freedom to people around the world."

In 1938, Congress passed a bill that each Novfember 11 shall be celebrated and known as Armistice Day. It was changed to Veterans' Day in 1954 as a was to honor the servicemen of all America's wars. At that time, Presisent Dwight D. Eisenhower challenged America in this way when he said, "Let us solemnly remember the sacrifices of all those who fough so valiantly, on the seas, in the air, and on foreign shores, th preserve our heritage of freedom."

The 4-H Citizenship Pledge begins like this: "We individually and collectively pledge our efforts from day to day to fight for the ideals of this nation." Is it possible that the ideals of American freedon is somthing in which we as common 4-Hers should be consciously active? While it is difficult to for us protectAmerican freedom in the ways our shldiers do, We can show pride in our freedom by displaying the American flag at home. As 4-Hers, we must also learn how to properly handle the flag. After all, it represents the spirit of liberty and human freedom.

I believe the freedoms that all Americans enjoy were bought with the blood, sweat, and lives of citizens who heard the call. Today there are 19 million war vererans living in the United States. They are deserving of honor. But at the same time, according to the Department of Defence, there have been over 619,000 US Casualties of war cince World War 1. Most recently, more than 2,000 American deaths have occurred in the war in Iraq. My cousin, Sgt. Bradley J. Harper, was one of them. He was only 25 years old when his Amphious Assault Vehicle was attacted by an explosive device on August 3, 2005. Brad and 13 others were killed instantly.

To millions of people all over the world, America is a magic name. Here we have schools, parks, libraries, churches, playgrounds, and the freedom to choose our vocations. We should remember that every benefit and every right was bought for us at a great price. And today, no matter if we support the War on terror or not, we need to remember those fighting for our freedoms, and those who are making daily sacrifices to perserve our American heritage.

As I watched the hundreds of family, friends, complete strangers, and soldiers pass by Brad's flagged-draped casket, the ideals of American freedom suddenly became real.Now when i see an American Flag, it stands as a stedfast reminder of Brad's and other soldier's personal sacrifice for us all. It reminds me of the words spoken by Presidents Eisenhower and Bush challenging us to remember why we celebrate Veteran's DAy. It is because of Brad's death that i better understand what I have been learning in my 4-H citizenship project.

I would like to conclude by reading a poem written by Kelley Strong who is a retired Commander with the United States Coast Guard. Written in 1981, this was a tribute to his father - a career marine who served two tours of duty in Vietnam.

FREEDOM IS NOT FREE

I watched the flag pass by one day.
It fluttered in the breeze.
A young Marine saluted it,
And then he stood at ease.

I looked at him in uniform
So young, so tall, so proud,
With hair cut square and eyes alert
He'd stand out in any crowd.

I thought how many men like him
Had fallen through the years.
How many died on foreign soil?
How many mothers' tears?

How many pilots' planes shot down?
How many died at sea?
How many foxholes were soliders' graves?
No, freedom isn't free.

A Poem

2006-10-09T13:52:00.000-05:00

Agape Love
by: Joyce Daniel

With outstreached hands HE died for me.
On a lonesome hill on Calvary.

HE bore the burden of every man
His sinless blood ran on the sand.

HE could have called the angels down
HE stood the pain without a sound.

HE did what his father called him to do
HE came to bear the sins of me and you.

With unselfish love HE bleed and Died
From the undeserved wound in His holy side.

They nailed Him to the Holy Cross
But He endured because we all were lost.

A crown of thorns placed upon His head
You must remember what my Jesus said.

Father forgive them for they know not what they do
Yes my sweet Jesus died for me and you.

Before He died He said it is done
I know God said well done my son.

He slept for three days then He arose in His might
Bring salvation, bringing his light.

Don't let His dying be in vain
Come to Jesus now because Jehovah will reign.

Here is ths website where i found it at..
www.christart.com/poetry/poem785.htm

Serving God

2006-08-26T13:00:00.000-05:00

Serving God through serving our church. Today the youth group did a "Hands and Feet day" at our Church. About 55 youth and about 25 adults were that. We pulled weeds, worked in flower beds, and stuff like that. We worked about 5 hrs. And the church looks a lot better! We bonded with everone, got to know some youth we didnt really know before, and had fun while serving God! I got to spend the day with Amelia and got to know her personality a little bit better. it started to get hot and yet everyone stayed till the work was done. i think we all enjoyed it! We got to spend the day with duff, Jeff, corey, and a lot more adults. I got to know them all a little better. I love all of them and cant wait till tomorrow to see all them agian!

Stuff going on in my Life

2006-08-20T20:44:00.000-05:00

Stuff going on in my life right now........where to begin?? um..My relationship with God is not as strong right now as it was like last month, but its still really strong!! Right now if you asked me to go out and witness with you, I would say YES in a heartbeart. My relationship with all my friends are the strongest they have ever been!! I have so much fun when i am hanging out with them. My small group leaders, Mrs. Lacey and Mrs. Susan, I love them to death!! They are awesome! And my sunday school leader, mrs. lisa, she awesome! And Duff is awesome to! God has diffenitly used all of them to help me with my relationship with God,ya know what i mean?? And Boyettie (Jeff) he was the first adult i talked to about rededicating my life. And Carly, where to begin?? um.. last year, she ans Lacey were my small group leaders, and she is an aweoms Godley ladie!! when we were hanging out together, i felt so different than i did at homw or at church, and church was just funner with her there! I'm not trying to sound selfish or anything but, I think that God brought them to Nashville to help me with my walk with God. I mean they were not even here a whole year and they moved back to Jackson. I miss them so much!! I love Carly!! Well thats all for tonight. Goodnight. love ya!

New life through Christ Jesus!

2006-08-19T22:28:00.000-05:00

HI! I'm Holly. Life through Christ Jesus is the Best!! Life without him is so hard! A couple months ago i talked to Boyettie (Jeff) about rededicating my life to God. Then the wed after that, i talked to Adam (Duff) about it. And a couple sundays later i went down front and made it known to the church. When i was walking down to the front with Nessa (She rededicated her life to!) and Boyettie (Jeff(He went down with us for support)), it was hard, i felt so scard, cause i didnt know what everyone would think. But once we got down there, and after we sat there on the front row for like 5 mins, my knees were shaking so hard then, but i was not scard, i was so happy! I had donw it! Now all i had to do was stand up in front of everyone for a couple of mins and then everyone came through and gave us hugs! It was one of the coolest feelings i have ever felt! I cant explane how happy and alive i had felt after! I had felt so close to God! I had never felt so close to Him!! I love God with all my Heart!! I have a heart for lost people. When i hear someone say somthin bad, i feel so sorry for them! Even my own brother! And his girlfriend! Well thats all i have to say right now. God Bless!!!